Terasa?

I heard people saying that someone terasa because of my blog this and that, I know you, and If you're reading, jangan la terasa, ada pasal kitak ka mun kitak terasa gilak? Don't accuse me of such a stupid thing, mature k. Ask me and since sekolah sik sama, dm ka inbox ka tok sik, accuse macam2 kakya I'm not stupid la whatever la, kmk sikda pun padah pasal ktk? Ktk Ada nga nama ktk ya ka? Or memang ktk gya? Suka gilak terasa? Heh mun ktk terasa gilak, fine whatever. My intentions are good,bukan nak nyinde ktk ka apa. Dah2 i don't wanna fight, pmr is coming up. So, get your horses ready and berjuang ;) As the saying says, 'makan cili, terasalah pedasnya.' Whatever la peace out xxx mina 

A best friend, a crush, a brother since form 2

Dude, I'm sorry if you got hurt or anything, I just want you to know, I anggap taduak tk brothers and sisters now. I know kmk melebih layan ktk, and I know I might have raised your hopes high, I'm really sorry, I can't help myself, best layan ktk, you know you're the sweetest thing anyone can ever have, hypothetically, i have my days with you, though you're mean, but you still remain sweet :)  memang Betul kmk tercarik2 ktk after taduak Sik melayan, but now I just feel guilty. I'm really sorry :') Kmk bukan mk main prasaan ktk, i know how that feels, mun ktk pike kmk main pasaan ktk, ktk slh, ktk pun tauk kmk knk main prasaan oleh ex nak? Ktk eboh riso k? You'll find that girl someday, *pump your elbow* but till then, though we're not speaking to each other, I'm always by your side dude, ala anggap je adik engkau yang kau tak pernah ada :p dolok memang crush, but kejap jak, don't know, you were so shy msa form 2. Hahahaha tipu la mun kmk padah kmk sik pernah suka ktk or terjatuh hati, dgn cara ktk layan kmk, hahaha. thanks :) yala you humble boy, layan la pmpuan nk ktk suka dgn baik, cnfirm dpt ;) Dush, till then bro, 'cow lok.' hahaha selamat hari raya, maaf zahir dan batin :)

Raya! Balik kampung! :D

Heyyy! Are you going to kampung this raya? How's the month of fasting? Tiring is it? Well for some people like me, they will feel tired and challenging to fight your nafsu. although i'm tired, but yeah, it was fun. Iftar at school, restaurants and so on. I'm going back to mukah for raya and i'm not really thrill cause tinggal dekat hotel and I'll feel home sick and miss my gulin so much :'( home sick cause the hotel is always so cold and It's been such a long time since I celebrate the first day of eid there ;) Hmm, and anis is going to celebrate eid at kuch :') it won't be like last year anymore, we won't meet at the open hotel as I'm celebrating eid at mukah. We can't go to kuch cause yknow, when we hang out with our cousins, we tend to miss out on our main purpose to be there ;) Leka jak gk ho Azra? Miss you babe ;) after PMR kmk jumpa ktk, together we poret hahahaha tapi you gik sekolah hahahaha lek ah. Go cycling together k? ;) I miss y'all there ;( rindu mk bukak posa sma2 :) till my next entry, xxxx M for mina ;)

Trial and psycho

Hmm trial ONE! (; i didn't expect that i can achieve my no more C target but i did ;) i'm quite happy and i've taken a small step to make my goal 75 and above. I know it's quite high but i don't want to think about my pmr during the raya holidays. I want to get excellent marks for trial 2. Hmmm so far ramadhan for me this year is great. But haihh tang excited jak mk tadarus then the second dayy BAMM sikpat tadarus :( so sad. InsyaAllah next week maybe i can. Kakya, ada laki gila tk. I sik penah bersua pun ngnnya nya bencik aku,pa kes? I was shocked and at the same time, i just blurted out what was in my mind. I knew him from my friend, and they made fun of him while i just sat there, i didn't say anything cause i don't even understand. Hate me boy? F you. I don't freaking care. But one point is sure, that i don't even knew you existed. Bencik gilak kau nga muka aku,brambus la tup mata boh nga, sng hati. Malas melayan org kdk kau. Bak kata pepatah, layan org bodo, kau jd bodo juak (; therefore, i sik layan ;)

I gotta snap out of it. PMR is 3 months away, I've cut all the holidays that we're gonna have. So heck yeah, big reason to worry. Cover all form 1 form 2 pun belom :/ only mathematics, bm, bi only :( the rest? huarghhhhhhhhhhhh! It's hard when everything I do, I sometimes think about that idiot boy who doesn't even know I thought of him. ahh who cares? Dah dah, sik maok main soal hati dan perasan. Serious! PMR! After Pmr, then I can think about this longer. :') There's nothing anyone can do to ease this feeling. Nothing. I repeat NOTHING. I'm all on my own. Sure the hell yeah it's sad but yeah, i'm strong :p hahaha It sometimes got me thinking whenever he upsets me, It's something that that idiot can't do to me. I felt terrible cause that thought came to my mind. I'm a very terrible person. I felt so guilty. I shouldn't even dreamt about that idiot. I don't want to tell anyone. Not anyone about this. I don't want people to think that I'm kenja or whatever la. He has this small piece of me that he took with him. Cewah. hahahahaha lol -.-

Hmmmm

phew. Panic Attack. Anxiety Attack? AHH, the first day i actually finished a glass of cold americano. That same day, as soon as i went home, I felt dizzy, my heart was pounding so fast, I thought i was dying or going insane, I couldn't breathe, I can't even focus when I tried to study, I'm always beware of my surroundings like paranoia. yeah -.- I can't shake of those feelings. But yeah, it's normal. I have a small body and I didn't drink that much, lagi2 I minum coffee yang ada caffein yang grind sendiri. Well, saje je nak coba kan. Now, I can't sleep cause I drank Peach Tea -.- my stomach merajuk ahh. :(

My life is kinda a mess right now. Holidays are for studying. Yeah STUDYING. I end up watching Desperate Housewives and YEAH the whole season 7 and season 8 part 1! and hell yeah, I thought I would be studying during the holidays, but, yeah me and my lazy ass. I can't find a way to get off my lazy ass and study. I mean, Salute those whose always studying and don't have a problem with studying like me. Well, certainly I want to succeed like others, but yeah, this ain't gonna get me no where if i'm lazy. TIPS PLEASE?! I can't seem to get anything in my head, when people think of holidays, I'd be thinking about yknow the type of holiday, the relaxing and taking studies away. but yeah, I can't possibly do that at the mean time. I have to try to reconnect. yes, reconnect. hmm. KHB? yes i do need tuition. KHB is the most boring subject ever! I do understand the first two or three topics that the teachers teach, but yeah, good luck teaching me, cause I'm hell of a student :p hahaha :p jkjk. I just don't seem to like KHB. I don't have any interest or whatsoever. All i'm interested in KHB is the BAB teras, ELEKTRIK. I mean, I like gamba rajah, cause that's the only thing that I'm fast at memorizing. I have a heck of a mind, I know. But yeah, i do forget it as fast as I memorize it. Well the point is, I don't have any interest in studying nowadays. I open my sej book,  and all i can say in my mind was, UGH MALAS, BESOK LAH. I mean, I was so determined. Now? I don't know if i can work that hard for that 8A's. Hmm, I guess i just need pressure. And that's why mum finally got a tutor. and yeah, heck of a tutor, pressure. GEO, MATHS, KHB,BM? ohhh god. BANYAKK DER! and she's coming to the house. grrrrr :3 mum said she's be harsh. -.- It's like I don't have enough pressure in school. hmm yeah -.- believe it or not, mum haven't contacted her yet. SO, i think i'm gonna try to ace the upcoming exam.